Wednesday, December 4

Hands-On Gifts

Well, Thanksgiving is over. Now it's an even scarier time of year for many Americans: holiday gift-buying season. You might well get stampeded while innocently trying to buy a new white t-shirt at the Gap. Or while stocking up on toilet paper at Target.

In high school, my friends and I loved going to the mall (literally the epicenter of our planned community) in December. We never knew who might show up. Now, the idea of going to any mall more than once in the twenty-four pre-Christmas shopping days in December makes me almost insanely claustrophobic. Have you seen how many teenagers hang out there?

There are of course three ways that I know of to get around the traditional shopping rush at Christmas:

1. Shop early. Buy everything on sale immediately after Christmas, tag it, hide it and pull it out December 1 to wrap. Or buy copper pots on your summer trip to Paris, or pearls when you go to Hong Kong in the spring. (This method does not work for me. If I buy presents in advance, I almost always wind up buying a second gift on December 23rd that I like better. Alternatively, I forget what I bought and for whom, and then I have two presents for half my family and nothing for whomever I'm going to see on Christmas Eve.)

2. Shop over the Internet. Now this is a good option. You can start shopping before Thanksgiving, when you can often score free shipping. You can rush the shipments if you get too close to the first night of Hanukkah. And, you can get gifts that are not available at your local Sam Goody. Unfortunately, the sweater that looked so limey on the website might be closer to puce in your house, and the candy might be crushed within its pretty tin, which you won't know until the recipient opens it and has to eat it with a spoon. In my mind, the Internet is great for buying books, non-breakable tchotchkes, and clothes that I've already scoped out in a brick-and-mortar establishment.

3. Make your presents! Or at least, make something to accompany your presents. I find that brothers and sisters tend to get ticked off when all you give them, year after year, is a loaf of pumpkin bread and a hand-written poem. (Just kidding. If I ever tried to give my sister a loaf of bread and anything handwritten for Christmas, I would be dead already.)

Nevertheless, homemade food gifts are great for office cookie exchanges and to dress up a gift that you fear might otherwise be deemed impersonal. If your friends are as food-obsessed as some of mine are, they might be touched and well-satisfied with a selection of handmade, prettily-wrapped presents. There is a galaxy of easy tasty food gifts that you can make, and lots of them don't even require a real recipe. For instance:

What says Christmas better than minty candy? One of the ladies at our local Historical Society makes the best peppermint bark in the history of the world. She won't part with the recipe, but a decent approximation can be made by melting twelve ounces of white chocolate in the microwave (don't use chips – they tend to seize up for some reason. Believe me, I tried). While the chocolate is melting, put five or six candy canes in a big heavy-duty Ziploc bag, zip it shut, and bang and mash them into oblivion with a rolling pin.

Line a rimmed cookie sheet with waxed paper. Mix the crushed peppermint into the melted chocolate, add two or three drops of peppermint oil if you have it – if you don't, don't stress, it will still be delish – and spread to about a quarter-inch-thickness on the waxed paper. Refrigerate for thirty minutes or so and break into large pieces. Box in little white candy boxes tied with ribbon. Give away before you eat it all.

Not into sweets? Try homemade pepper sauce. I myself became intrigued with this idea when queried for a recipe by a certain almost-famous sportswriter. To make a quart of "Louisiana hot sauce" – the kind that predated Tabasco – stem and chop about three cups of the hot peppers of your choice. Don't seed them, for if you do you will remove all the heat. Combine the peppers with two cups of apple cider vinegar, a couple cloves of garlic, and a tablespoon of kosher salt in a food processor fitted with a normal metal blade. Blend until smooth. Let sit at least three weeks before using.

You can strain this if you like a thinner hot sauce, or just leave the pepper puree in it for a thicker one. If you want to preserve this for your lifetime, you can can it according to the normal procedure, or just make sure that the label says to refrigerate. It will keep in the fridge for months.

If neither of those ideas appeal and you have a baker in your life, make homemade vanilla extract, which makes normal people swoon. Buy a bottle of plain Absolut (cheap vodka will not come out as well, and better vodka should not be contaminated this way) and three to four whole vanilla beans. Pour approximately one shot of the vodka out so that you can really shake the bottle. Slice the vanilla beans longways down the middle and cut each one in half. Add to the vodka, cap it, and shake vigorously at least once a day for at least three weeks. Decant through a strainer into appropriately-sized bottles for giving.

If all else fails, and you find yourself up late for the tenth night in a row wrapping presents and addressing cards, try the recipe to the right of the screen for chocolate-covered espresso beans. If you can keep from eating them all yourself, they will also make a great present. (Or you can just keep them around, for later sleepless holiday nights.)